Sixteen (er, seventeen almost!) weeks.

There’s a baby in there. I met him or her Saturday…and, well…fell in love. It was the most active ultrasound I have ever had! I wonder if it’s because of the timing, I’ve had ultrasounds at 8 weeks, and 20 weeks, but never 16…well, actually according to the ultrasound, I was 4 days ahead which makes the baby 17 weeks along on Tuesday, and yet I am once again (as with Noelle & Gabe) actually surprised to see a little person in there!
For now, we’ve decided not to ask the baby’s gender (but, we’ve reserved the right to change our minds!) and are looking forward to the added surprise at birth (or whenever Noelle changes her mind! ☺) After Mark gets the baby’s first pictures scanned in, I’ll post one! I keep thinking about pasting a belly photo, but I haven’t gotten around to it! I will try this week! Maybe Tuesday to mark the beginning of a new week for the baby.
You should know, that I am riding unbuckled on an emotional roller coaster from hell! A lot of the time, I am just trying to hold it all together and get things done that need to be done, but for the most part I want to let my body fall fractured to the floor. I’ve been overwhelmed. Not just with one thing in particular, but with everything. It seems like my sensitive nature has been amped 110 volts. I feel sort of whacked out and unstable, but in a ‘somethin’ good’s gonna come of this’ sort of way, not the ‘someone’s gonna pay’…although it seems I am payin’. I feel like on the other side of the journey with this new little person inside me (who apparently has the gift of revealing things within people, as well as the gift of reconciling relationships or at least pointing out areas that need reconciling)…on the other side of this journey, I will find myself a more complete woman, stronger and more aware of myself and my part in the world as a woman, wife, mother, teacher and friend. I can see this woman, she smiles at me from across a fast moving stream, I can see she knows what’s ahead, but where she is now is peacefully confident, a little less arrogant and self-centered. A little less afraid to fail, but willing to fail and try again. A little more sure of her gifting, and where to apply it to be most effective.
I am almost as anxious to meet her, as I am to meet my new little blessing…almost.

☺